The book consists of useful information that allows magicians to improve their magical workings. I felt honored by the invitation and we quickly started writing on the manuscript, hence *this* short article I posted some time afterwards and which does not reflect the intensity of my dedication to this project - I used to do research even while showering, for example. Thanks to Andres' ingenuity, we were able to make use of an online platform (Thank you, Sebastian!!!) I cannot talk about too much because of my ignorance when it comes to tech stuff. Nevertheless, this platform allowed both of us to make changes directly on the manuscript simultaneously, which in turn made our task easier. The platform's chat helped us keep track with each other's changes and allowed us to leave quick notes for the other as the work progressed.
The best thing about this platform, to my mind, is the fact that it allowed quick and easy making of tables and graphics, which provide visual aid to the concepts presented within the book. Naturally, Andres was the one who created the graphics and tables, as I'm an imbecile by default when it comes to doing things that are new to me. All those codes gave me a constant headache\footnote{Much headache for me, them codes...}, as I constantly had to be careful not to delete any bit of them while I was going about doing my writing. I did my best to stay away from them in order not to fuck anything up. I did fuck up some codes a bunch of times and started to panic like a little girl, but Andres calmly fixed it, so I stuck to my writing for the most part. I eventually got the hang of it with Andres' help, this being more than enough proof even someone like me can do new things!
Even so, the work was tedious. First of all, we live in time zones that are somewhat far apart - Chile and Romania. There were very few occasions during the day when we were both online and working on the manuscript at the same time. Needless to say (here's to you, Nick!), each of us had our personal things to deal with. We were able to catch up on that more during holiday season.
Second of all, we had to constantly make small adjustments to the text, as newer pieces of information were added. Being true to his scholastic side, Andres thoroughly researched old sources and made translations from old manuscripts, information which was then added into the book in one form or another. This, obviously, required constant text maintenance. And being true to my maniacal nature when it comes to seeing through with any project as soon as possible, I kept writing like a mad man. This created its own series of difficulties, despite Andres telling me from the start there's no deadline to the project and we can take out time.
Thirdly, none of us is a native English speaker, which made us pay even more attention to the text and the way we phrased our ideas so they would be easy to comprehend - for those of you who don't know, Spanish and Romanian have many similarities, but their morphology differs from that of the English language, so extra care was needed when it came to wording phrases.
BUT!!! The valiant defender of the British language, none other than Nick Farrell (the link to Nick's blog is to the right of the page), Pontifex Maximus of the GD-PGM tradition (the man has literally constructed his own tradition, how cool is that?!), has stepped in to provide us with much needed linguistic assistance!!! Good ol' Nick is continuing to be a dear! As such, I want to thank him for his help despite having to deal with his personal stuff, as well as battling his way through the zodiac decan by decan. Given this is the second time Nick's edited a project I've taken part in, I think paraphrasing Eminem would be appropriate:
"I've created a monster
Cause nobody wants to see my name
They wanna see Nick's on the cover
Well if you want Nick, this is what I'll give you"
I also want to thank him for not going too British into editing the text, thus maintaining a note of authenticity of a text written by non-native English speakers without the text resembling a dialogue between Jeronimo and Tarzan. In case you're a native English speaker, don't worry! No one butchered your language! Nick eventually went British af and that generated conflicts that blew out of proportion to such magnitude the fabric of creation was at risk constantly, yet the underlying fun factor favored Order over Chaos, so reality is still intact. Nick also had to navigate through the codes, so I thank him yet again for his patience and diligence! He added further contribution to the book by providing us with certain explanations, as well as inserting tiny drops of knowledge and British humor here and there. Anyone interested in suggestive dialogues and images on how the book was written and edited can scroll past the end of the article.
When it comes to the tone used in the book, it is a formal one, denoting seriousness. This is unlike my previous books, because this book was thought differently. And also because Andres is a serious person. Actually, I'm a very serious person myself, underneath my wacko facade that has many people foolishly think I'm an idiot - think Xellos Metallium - there being a difference between me saying of myself I'm an idiot and people thinking that based on what they don't (care/want to) understand.
Anyway, Andres' approach was to compile as much useful information as possible, be it contradictory at first glance, which, backed by suggestive imagery and detailed tables would enrich the reader's knowledge. He also made more than a few scientific additions to the manuscript, along with mathematical calculations, and so on, besides bestowing the reader with pieces of his knowledge and expertise. I, on the other hand, went gung-go on writing the XYZ of practical recommendations, while OCD-ing and acting like a deranged lunatic, trying to tie up any lose ends. And good ol' Nick, while skilfully navigating "a nightmare of a text" (prolly because of the codes, or mostly because of my writing style tee-hee), kept Britishing his way through it one word at a time (and one code at a time). And since I'm going on and on about those damn codes, here's a screenshot of how the manuscript looks like when the codes are applied:
Many other issues arose that had to be overcome, yet I think we managed to do so with ease. At some point I felt overwhelmed by the complexity of the data I was handling and the many connections I had to make between each piece of information throughout the text, while sticking to one of the initial ideas I wanted to present. It just so happened that, at that time, I was oblivious of that idea, even though I strongly sensed it lurking in the back of my mind. So I called on my old buddy, Raziel - I refer to him more in a book which I began to write a few years ago, yet I still don't know when or if I am going to publish. His answer was simple, but highly illuminating: "You already know XYZ, you just have to keep in mind they were arranged that way...". Frankly speaking, the sheer complexity of the book and the details inside would've given me terrible headaches and I would've given up a few years back because I was incapable of taking on such an endeavor at the time, even with the help of another. Luckily for me, all that is in the past now, as I'm benefiting more and more from the changes I've done in myself by working using the methods I present in my first book, The Magick of Astrorelationships.
Anyway, despite the issues we had to overcome, we made great progress and managed to compile enough useful information for anyone willing to make use of it. I'm kind of amazed that, although we didn't make any table of contents to start from in the first place (like any normal writer would do), the actual process of writing the book was smooth af (prolly because we're para-normal writers)! Making use of an old cliche, it practically wrote itself. More exactly, it's as if the book had a mind of its own and dictated what is to be written in it. At least that's how I felt. In some way we wrote it like were were two baked teens, although it was just as easy from a certain point of view. Yet in another way, the whole process was very demanding and the time it took us to finish it should be proof enough. The chapters flowed easily one after another and any additional information that was incorporated into already finished chapters seemed to fit perfectly with the overall content. Again, this doesn't mean we half assed it, as we tried to be as thorough and as meticulous as possible whenever the situation called for it, especially when it came to explaining things of a capital nature - yes, Nick! Gemini can be meticulous too *wink*.
And it came out great, in my opinion. In short, the book presents ancient Babylonian, Egyptian, and Greek astrological concepts, those from the Hellenistic period, medieval Arab ones, those from Renaissance Europe, as well as modern ones. In addition to that, it offers some mythological details and also more than a little astronomical information some might find useful. And I almost forgot, a touch of poetry! More importantly, it contains recommendations on how to apply astrology in one's magical endeavors. The prettiest thing about it is that it can be used for working with celestial, terrestrial, and chthonic forces alike, as the occultist who makes use of it in his or her magical operations will find sufficient data inside that will allow them to plan their operations. And the book also guides beginners into interpreting a zodiac chart, something which can be of great help for anyone who hasn't got the slightest idea on how to do it. Besides the extensive electional details, it also offers some information on natal and relationship astrology, along with brief symbolism and a pinch of Kabbalah and Qabalah (yeah, they're two different things!). I think Andres would say that it represents a strong vector for providing horizontal transfer of knowledge.
And MOST importantly, it provides technical education for both providers of occult services and their potential customers, as scenarios such as *this one* or *this one* are highly unfortunate and should not happen if the magician knows what they're doing and the customer knows what to ask for! Not wanting to sound dramatic, but occultists and those who seek occult services should read this book in order to prevent possible tragedies caused by spells and such done at inauspicious times.
To get an idea of the complexity of the book, the table of contents consists of 13 chapters, each consisting of one or more sub-chapters (21 being the most). Some sub-chapters contain one or more sub-sections. Here are the 13 chapters and you're free to discover their sub-chapters and sections by buying the book:
1. Introduction
2. Fundamental astrological concepts
3. Moon in depth
4. Retrograde
5. Natal charts and magic
6. The fixed stars
7. Shem HaMephorash
8. Spirits of the zodiac chart
9. The Arabic Lots
10. Planetary days and hours
11. Astrological exercises
12. Predispositions
13. Bonus: Guide
And here are some teasers in the form of screenshots of the manuscript while it was still undergoing editing:
If it sparks your interest, good. If not, good.
AND! The book will also be published EN ESPAÑOL as soon as possible, so more readers can have easier access to the information it offers. And the link to Andres' page can be found on the blog wall, to the right, people being able to buzz him when it comes to calculating whatever names the book says can be calculated from one's natal chart, as he's willing to do it for a fee.
This is by far the most demanding, complex, time and energy consuming project I've taken part of and I think it was totally worth it! So thank you, Andres! The book is some 370 pages long (many words!), but it could've easily been over 500 - Nick made sure it didn't become larger than his Helios book! What can I say, we made Mars retrograde and Mercury retrograde work in our favor :D We even broke the damn software at some point, as it couldn't keep up with the amount of data we kept adding!!! (Thank you again for fixing it, Andres!)
Oh, and there's some notions that keep repeating themselves a few times throughout the book. That was deliberate. And I think Americans in particular would benefit from this book, as we've used their country as a brief example when it comes to discussing things that are of great interest for the American people. Not only that, but the book as a whole can offer them a broader perspective of why their country is experiencing certain difficulties.
Between you and I, Andres, I'm positive this book is far more than a combination between Sailor Moon and Saint Seiya, or whatever other Japanese anime series you can think of *wink*! Honestly, this book is a major level-up for me. Not only does it have a professionally made cover (Thank you, Mario!!!) unlike the ones I've struggled to make using an image editor in the past, but it also has many characteristics of a book of a more "scholastical" nature, such as footnotes, images with titles, alphabetical index, a lengthy and varied bibliography, etc. Who said I can't "scholasticate"??? Moi?! Hah! I mean, Andres is the scholar, but I can scholasticate fo sho! I mean, I can make scholastic image talismans (I can also turn myself into them, following an illustrious example) and we did add a section on them in the book, doh! Anyway, we also added a philosophical touch to the book, in the spirit of the
Picatrix (here's to you, Maslama!), as well as some historical data. Here's the bibliography some time in the second stage of the project (I think the end result is 106 references):
What I also liked about doing this project with Andres is that, besides the fact it was fun and Andres made it so much easier due to his nerdy skills, him and I have something in common occult-wise. That is to say, his (real!) energy work skills and knowledge blend very well with what I've come to learn from energy healing prior to becoming involved in magick. As such, we are able to see things from different perspectives than an average (many!) occultist(s), which enables us to observe different nuances in the environment that most people are oblivious of. This common denominator between us made it easier for us to collaborate on this project and it also manifests in the book, as the readers will find out upon closer inspection. Even though it's subtle for the most part, there are a few cases where it pokes you in the eye, so watch out! :D This only adds to the uniqueness of the book, in my opinion, making it stand apart from others of the occult genre and stand out as covering several interconnected topics at least some occultists are likely to be interested in.
I'm positive this book will receive its share of criticism (I'm criticizing myself already for not bringing it closer to perfection! Andres has nothing to do with this, it's just my self-criticism kicking in), not all of it being of a constructive nature and not all of it coming from people who read it. This is more likely going to happen later, rather than sooner, due to the small number of readers I have, yet I'm sure more people will acquire it over time. If anyone should happen to be offended by anything written inside this book, then know it was all Andres! I'm kidding. It was all me! Andres only allowed me to write that. Because I threatened him! That is not true, actually, but anyway - if you're offended, blame me! I could've easily lash out like a severely underfucked nympho suffering from a hyped up PMS, yet I resumed to writing some passages people are likely to find as being... spicy.
Oh, and if any reader is annoyed with the large number of footnotes in some cases, blame me! I eventually learned how to use the code for it and I couldn't help myself but to play with it afterwards!!! Same case for the tsunami of page references in some sections!!! :D :P In short, if you want to criticize the book, criticize me instead, just because. Except for one thing that will be revealed further on! That's on Nick!!!
Asteria has the most beautiful personality though: fiery, sexy, alluring, captivating, mesmerizing, knowledgeable, practical af, and above all, a great people person! We've also made it so she's sensitive to the suffering of others and does not lack haters lurking in the background plotting against her. She's also super powerful, her innate power being enough to make her blast away any hater with ease! She can also be slutty if she wants to, but without being a hoe ; ) Any energy directed towards Asteria only makes her more powerful.
Not to mention the fact I'm constantly feeding off of the hate and envy I'm receiving even after I stepped down from the occult spotlight, so:
Hate on, dum-dums!
The Great Gazoo & The Southern Shaman & Pontifex Maximus
PS: a follow-up volume is likely to drop (Astaria's sexy sister, hopefully soon), so stay tuned!
PS2: Nick here is likely to start his own publishing business (hopefully soon!), so stay tuned! You better start praying for me to experience eternal happiness effective immediately, meanie, or imma flood your business with SO MANY books containing SO MANY pretty words you'd kill yourself!!! >:D
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BONUS:
Andres: "I went ahead and wrote 'this' over in 'that' section."
Me: "Cool! I'll look it up and continue writing from it."
...
Me: "Is it ok with you if I write 'this' over 'there'?"
Andres: "(...)"
Me: "(Hmmm, he said nothing, so imma write it anyway and he's free to delete it, tee hee!)"
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(A few days after Nick joined the project, during which time he kept bitching over the software)
Me: "Andres, did you change the language settings to English UK?"
Andres: "Nope."
Me: "Nick?!"
Nick: "I don't know how to do that in this dodgy software."
Me: "Aaaargh! What sort of sorcery is this???"
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Me: "Ummmm, Nick? You left some extra spaces behind."
Nick: "That wouldn't be the case if I were using my usual editing software instead of this clunky website!"
Me: "Now now, Nick. Your Higher Genius made you edit this book so that you can reconcile your Virgo with your Gemini, play an active role in the splendid process of horizontal transfer of knowledge, and then some ;b"
Nick: "Bollocks!"
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Me: "Nick, I wrote *this* word *there* because you must've deleted too many words by mistake. S'all good now, moving on."
Nick: "(Having gained subtle powers recently, senses his ego might be threatened and... rewrites the whole sentence just like that!)"
Me: "Jeez, Nick. It was only a 4-letter word."
Nick: "(Having destroyed any real or imaginary threat to his ego, proudly moves on saying nothing)"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Nick: "Expand on *that* idea."
Me: "Ugh ffs... Ok imma do it tomorrow coz it's late and I'm tired and I also have to cast on the heavens or the whole world go boom."
Nick: "Do it now."
Me: "Wtf, Nick! Whole world go boom!!!"
Nick: "I've lost my empathy."
Me: "Wow... with each passing day you're turning more and more into... me!!! (>:D tee-hee!)"
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Me: "(Being hyper OCD) Andres! I need XYZ! There! And there!!! And... And... fuck, I forgot... Aaaaaaa!!!"
Andres: "(Chill af, contemplating whatever a shaman is contemplating) Relax, it's all under control."
Me: "But Andres... Andres!!! Aaaaaaaa!!!"
Andres: "(Being the same degree of chill af) Alex, stop acting like Ana Karenina on her period. Take a break. When you get back you'll see everything is ok."
Me: "(OCD-ing off the charts) But *that*! *There* and... and *there*!!! Which reminds me... fuck!!!"
Andres: "(Same degree of chillness) There is a stone you can work with for your condition, but I pity the stone so I won't tell you about it."
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Nick: "Bloody hell! <Quote from text> this doesn't make any sense."
Me: "Ahem... If you were more Gemini you'd see it makes a lot of sense."
Nick: "I'm chopping it."
Me: "Wtf!!! Noooooooooooooooooo ffs!!!"
Nick: "Explain it."
Me: "Grrrr! Ffs!!! Instead of thanking me for fucking my brains out trying to explain complicated concepts in pretty words and arrange them in interesting ways so people would understand them easier, you're chopping them?!?!?!"
Andres: "(Cool af) Alex, relax. Take a deep breath and think of something nice. Everything will be ok."
Me: "I am very relaxed ffs! It's just that this meanie person is torturing me over words from his language he can't understand!!!"
Andres: "Alex, relax. Go impale someone to cool off. Then take a deep breath and think of something nice."
Me: "Ohmmmm... Booobs... I'm ok."
Andres: "Whatever works for you."
Nick: "(Impervious to my lamentations) Explain it."
Me: "Eeeeeek! The meanie person's still here!!!"
Andres: "It is Galilean relativity, which is different from Einstein's relativity. I could explain it in depth using scientific terms, but that would mean several more pages for you to edit."
Nick: "(Moving on as if nothing happened)"
Me: "See? I had no idea what that was called, yet I explained it very well using pretty words. Who da Gemini? Ah! Ah!"
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Andres: "(Getting tired of my ongoing battles with Nick) Uh boi... and here I thought magicians were supposed to be in certain ways... you two are childrens."
Me: "Ahem! Nick is the only magician here. You're shaman. I'm maverick polymath at best. And I'm already childrens ever since I woowoo-ed myself into it thanks to very little yet precious key info from Nick's book ;)"
Nick: "I thought I was a meanie."
Me: "Hah! So you admit it! >:)"
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Me: "Ummm, Nick! Psst! Nick! Ummm I added *this* small paragraph over there and I know you've passed that point, but could you go back and edit it?"
Nick: "Is that what you call a *small paragraph*?"
Me: "It's only a few phrases long..."
Andres: "The funny thing is, Nick, you seem to have a different understanding of the concept of *small paragraph*, while Alex has a different understanding of the concept of *the book is done, it just needs editing*."
Me: "d:"
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Me: "Avast, ye, meanie! I'm stopping you from chopping that!"
Nick: "How did you know I was going to chop it."
Me: "I'm more Scorpio and more Gemini than you, doh!"
Nick: "You better use that Gemini carefully, or I shall have to curse you."
Me: "Your arrogance blinds you, Master Farrell. You underestimate the power of my depths."
Nick: "It's not your depths I'm going to curse, it's your shallows. I'm going to curse you so that every woman takes your words at face value."
Me: "YESSSSSSSSS!!! Awwwwwwww how very sweet of you!!! Lemme know when so I'll power off my deflector shields."
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Me: "Nick! Nick!!! Teach me Victorian, will ya? Please, oh please!!!"
Nick: "What the... why would you want to speak 'Victorian'? Learn proper English first."
Me: "Lewl! Because... Niiiiick, I wanna talk like the founding fathers of the Golden Dawn! Me making fun of GD people who say 'Lesser Ritual if the Pantagram' would be even more hilarious if I did it in Victorian. So teach me, pleeeeeese!!!"
Nick: "What's wrong with Lesser Ritual of the Pentagram?"
Me: "Now now, Nick. We both know that's from Regardie and we both know Regardie's material which consists the basis for the GD revival movement is tainted by Uncle Al ;)"
Nick: "Regardie himself said he learned nothing but chess from Crowley. And how do you know all that???"
Me: "Now now, Nick. You can easily say you only learned from me how to pee against the wind without getting wet, and I can say only I learned how to throw dice from you. Yet we both know that's not true ;) As for your question, you will only get the Sign of Silence from me, sir."
Nick: " Yes but how..."
Me: "Sign of Silence! And besides, Nick. We both know the traditional name for said ritual is simply 'Ritual of the Pentagram'. Also, you've gone far enough into the manuscript to figure out I know how to work with Uranus and Neptune via traditional Golden Dawn techniques. Which reminds me, I gotta do a Neptune one one the heavens soon..."
Nick: "But where..."
Me: "Respect the Sign of Silence, damn it! Or Secret Chiefs curse you! :D Rest assured, no one broke their oaths and obligations! ;) Besides, I imagine by now you're close to what some Impotentor out there refers to as Ispipimus. As such, I'm sure you've read the original C papers from the SM and/or AO, therefore I also imagine if I were to tell you the technique you won't be able to say I'm bs-ing you ;) Furthermore, it's proven its effectiveness by now in my work alone. Yet I find it funny how some GD people make fun of Uncle Al. In addition to what I've said before, I'm sure he knew the techniques, since even though he is said to have been a mere 4=7 in the Golden Dawn, you'd find a hint to them in is latter work ;) So teach me Victorian!!!"
Nick: "I have finished one bottle of wine by now... user drunk..."
Me: "Grrrrrrrrrr!!! You no drink and write!!! Meanie!!!"
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Nick: "How many focking times are you going to use 'planet' in the same sentence?"
Me: "Ummmm, how many planets are there in the solar system, again?!"
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Me: "Ffs, Nick! You no edit Porphyry!!!"
Nick: "It's not Porphyry I'm editing, it's someone who translated him."
Me: "It's fucking Porphyry, man!!! He's like some kind of Neo-Platonic god-like figure, whatever the hell Neo-Platonic means... You don't want to upset the NEO-Neo-Planonics, do you???"
Nick: "How the hell don't you know what Neo-Platonic means???"
Me: "I'm not cultured and I hate to philosophize?!"
Nick: "(Mumbling in British) Well why the hell did you quote him, then???"
Me: "Because he speaks of such and such concepts, doh! And besides, people want fucking sources for some reason, and I'm trying to give them that so they won't be saying the sources for Asteria suck the same way your sources apparently suck... But you're a meanie and you no get it."
Nick: "Oh ffs, not again!"
Andres: "Truth be told, Nick, before we began this collaboration I couldn't care less if you were hit by a meteor. But during this time I've noticed you're not a bad guy after all."
Nick: "Yeah, people usually get the wrong impression of me."
Me: "NO! You're a meanie! With a capital MEANIE!!!"
Nick: "Oh, fuck off already!"
Me: "And there you go again with that 'fuck off' of yours that made people boo you in CMS a while back. While I hate having to repeat myself, imma do it one last time: it's 'fuck on', Nick! Fuck ON!!! People are not chaste, ya know. Even the god whom you're turned your back to said that, doh!"
Nick: "There you go again with than 'whom' of yours again."
Me: "I beg your pardon, sir! 'Whom' happens to be an ever so British word. It's a pretty word, its use denoting a certain je nais se quios."
Nick: "Its use denotes you're a clown!"
Me: "Alas, I had to lend my red nose to Rudolph this time of year. But I tell you this, sir: poppycock!!!"
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Nick: "I'm calling it a day. These headaches are killing me..."
Andres: "Alex, please leave Nick alone. You're jeopardizing the project."
Me: "It's not my fault the meanie person keep being a meanie, ffs!"
Nick: "I thought we established I'm not a bad guy after all."
Me: "No! You established that with Andres, meanie!"
Nick: "I will edit the rest of the chapter in my own software."
Andres: "Do it which ever way is best for you so you can come up with the best result."
Me: "Meanie!!! >:D"
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No one: "(Nothing)"
Me: "Kidney pudding, 5 o'clock tea, left lane driving, fish 'n' chips, lorry, sofa, double decker, knickers, fanny, Union Jack, tally ho, pip-pip (being rudely disrupted by)"
Nick: "Wtf has gotten over you???"
Andres: "Alex? Have you taken ALL your medicine today???"
Me: "I'm exercising my British O:-) Prince of Whales, Shakespeare, spotted dick, shitty weather (being rudely disrupted yet again by)"
Nick: "The weather in Rome can be worse at times."
Me: "(Not paying attention) Aleister Crowley (again...)"
Nick: "Drop dead!"
Andres: "I second that!"
Me: "(Britishing away) Michelle Thorne (again...)"
Nick: "Who's that?"
Me: "When I'll be wealthy imma hire her as my housemaid. Oh, I forgot... you're in Italia... Valentina Nappi!!!"
Nick: "My tastes in music end before the year 2000."
Me: "What the...!!! WTF!!!!!!!!!!"
Andres: "Alex, please take ALL your medicine and leave Nick alone."
Me: "He started it by being jealous of my British!!! And it's not my fault he no know who Michelle Thorne and Valentina Nappi are d:"
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Me: "Well, I'm sorry Nick, but in my opinion many occult books denote a tone of superiority of the author over the readers. My writing style is more personal, as if I were having a pleasant conversation with the reader over a few joints and beers, on a beach at sunset. I may not have billions of readers, but the few and ever so cool ones I have seem to enjoy it. I'm not using my usual style in this book out of respect for Andres and his decision, but I'm still making use of pretty words so the tone won't seem like a rainy day in a communist country."
Nick: "(Having lost his will to live, cursing his Higher Genius for not allowing him to curse me) ...sigh! You're not JUST writing pretty words. You're nailing them in with a sledgehammer ffs!!!"
Me: "O:-)" (the "-" is not redundant here!) "Moreover, Nick, I understand what you're saying about using senseless phrasing that would make people stop reading it. I'm not referring to that when I speak of *pretty words*. You see, there's subtle nuances in every language and they work by steering the mind towards a better understanding of the message as a whole, both at face value, as well as any possible underlying meanings, which although obscured at first sight, can be accessed with ease by allowing one's mind to easily navigate through the text. Think mental yoga, Nick. And since this book addresses complex data that can be questioned in many ways, I'm trying to make the reader understand certain things upon the acknowledgement of which many of their questions will fade away. That's why I'm meticulously arranging pretty words in an interesting order. If you delete pretty words or change them into plain words, those subtle nuances stop being explained, or are explained partially, which can cause more confusion to the reader. I'm like a painter. I paint pretty pictures in people's minds O:-)"
Nick: "Gemini is superficial and your pretty words are rocks for a ship of clarity."
Me: "Pretty words resent that! You take that back, meanie!!! Or they curse you!!! Furthermore, Nick, and do understand I'm not implying you're not a smart person, for this was already explained in the book and you've gone through that section - pay attention, man! - my natal Mercury is Thrice Greatest, while yours is... poopy! And... and... Fixed!!!"
Nick: "(Cursing in British) Watch it or..."
Me: "Or what? You gonna send some GD-PGM ghoul after me like them dum-dums did with Baron Samedi??? Bring it on!!! As I was saying, before being rudely interrupted by a meanie person for the billionth time, my Mercury would make some sexy hot af astrological talismans, while yours is the kind retarded-childrens-like occultists use to cast beneficial spells with. You wouldn't want to upset your Higher Genius, would you? >:b"
Nick: "(More cursing in British) And how would you know if my Higher Genius is angry at me?"
Me: "Because it's in touch with my Crowley-HGA, doh!"
Nick: "The Crowley-HGA who doesn't tell you important information for your life..."
Me: "Alas... I shall ask God to change it! And my higher self! And all my spirits! And the meanie editor!!!"
Nick: "That's what you get for following Crowley..."
Me: "You no pick on Uncle Al, you hear!!!"
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Nick: "I think you need to add *this*. It offers a better explanation."
Me: "(Making faces at Nick behind the screen)"
Andres: "I agree. It adds to more consistency."
Me: "But... But..."
Nick: "The aye's have it."
Me: "I'll get you both!!!"
Andres: "You'll have to stand in line if you want to curse me. Half my country is out to do it and the other half want to burn me at the stake."
Me: "I'm leaving the eclipse to deal with you for now!!! Pistols at dawn, Nick!!!"
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Me: "You no make fun of Uncle Al, Nick!!!" (Yes, dear readers, Meanie Nick - MeaNick... this sounds so cool! - has taken it upon himself to make fun of Uncle Al in this book. I was powerless to stop him from doing so, especially since it's Andres' project. I don't know your thoughts of the man, or any possible affinities you might have towards him. He is indifferent to me in general, but I have great interest in his magical work. I also feel a certain connection to him I can't quite explain. Anyway, if you're a Thelemite and you're reading this book... Nick did it! I told him it's on him and I will tell everyone. So here it is :D)
Nick: "(Not paying attention)"
Me: "You're a meanie!!!"
Nick: "You've got a lesser spirit posing for your Genius."
Me: "Why then is your Genius in touch with my Crowley-HGA then?"
Nick: "It's trying to warn you of the dangers you're exposing yourself to."
Me: "(This lesser spirit has thought me what you ended up doing on youself currently, tee-hee!) Keep that up and I won't cast on the heavens, meaning you'll prolly end up being stuck there and no fly bye bye towards your destiny... Gee... pity... You can stare at my ancestors on Hadrian's arch for all I care. Oh, be a dear and give them some wine, will ya? Their high priest burned their vineyards like a meanie that he was. Kinda like... YOU! Honestly... Suit yourself..."
Nick: "(Starting to hyperventilate) NO!!!"
Me: "Care to join me? :D"
Nick: "Anything!"
Me: "Can you still conjure an archangel or does Qabalah give you anaphylactic shock?"
Nick: "I still do angels, although in my Pagan way."
Me: "That's redundant. Can you conjure Tzaphkiel of Binah?"
Nick: "And Zaziel."
Me: "That's Zazel and he's the spirit of Saturn... I'm referring to the archangel of Binah."
Nick: "I call him Zazzi."
Me: "You're tripping balls, ffs!!!!!!!!! Can you conjure Tzaphkiel or you no fly bye bye???"
Nick: "Yes. I will conjure Zazzi too, just to nail the effects in the material faster."
Me: "(Rolling eyes) He! Is! Redundant! For! This!"
Nick: "Zazzi!"
Me: "Oh for the glory of Hristos Pantocrator!!! FINE!!! But command them EXACTLY LIKE THIS, OK???"
Nick: "(...)"
Me: "OH KAAAAAY????????"
Nick: "Command them to get things done!"
Me: "Oh sweet Pleroma... Say THIS: (...) OK???"
Nick: "Ok ok!"
Me: "Good, good. (He is unaware of the fact the ritual he's doing is somewhat redundant for the overall celestial scheme, but I want to test his determination :P) Oki, Nick! Knock yourself out! :D"
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And then there were cases when Andres and Nick went on and on philosophising around various concepts presented in the book. And I was like: "Ahem! That is explained in the next chapter, Nick! You'll get to it by January 1... 3031!!!"
And they were like: "Shush! We're having a grown-up conversation here!"
And I was like: "Fine! (You'll see... >:D)"
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Me: "Nick, I noticed you're done editing *that* section and you made very little changes to it. Does that mean you liked pretty words in there? :P"
Nick: "There were none there."
Me: "Hah! You were so mesmerized by the information in there you didn't even notice them because they blended nicely into the overall structure, their role being to enrich the structure and make it sturdy and nice :D"
Nick: "Most likely I fell asleep..."
Me: "Meanie!!! THAT is why people won't have the book for Christmas!!! The Grinch is nicer than you... snif snif..."
Nick: "(Being Pagan af)"
Me: "Yea yea, you still do angels so shut it :D"
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Nick: "I chopped that. It was all redundant."
Me: "Noooooooooo!"
Nick: "Stop whining or I will chop some more. In fact, I will chop zat too."
Me: "Noooooooooooo!"
Nick: "Better yet, I will make you chop it yourself. Go ahead then, chop zat."
Me: "Ummmm Nick?! You ok? You're spelling funny..."
Nick: "You vill chop zat, immediately!!!"
Me: "Now I see why you're using the word 'must' more than both of us put together. And we're the ones who were born in countries with totalitarian regimes. Ironic, dotcha think? :D"
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Me: "Ummmm, Nick?! I see you said nothing while editing *that* section. I wonder, was it really that bad you're saving your energies in order not to deplete yourself through criticism, or were you taking notes? d:"
Nick: "That was the hardest section I've edited so far..."
Me: "Ummmm, was it because of bad info, or too many codes?"
Nick: "Just the usual, although the codes did increase my headaches."
Me: "You mean... you OD on pretty words?!"
Nick: "That's what's been giving me headaches all along."
Me: "There's a local saying that says it takes one nail to take out another. It applies to hangover when someone drinks their hangover away."
Nick: "I will drink later."
Me: "Sheesh... In this context it applies as you subjecting yourself to even more pretty words to cure your pretty words OD."
Nick: "Rubbish!"
Me: "Now now, pretty words are like adorable kittens that purr cutely and want to play, but you shoo them away like a meanie Manticore (thanks to Andres, my vocabulary was enriched with a mythological creature name)."
Nick: "(Hand shaking while holding butcher knife to his jugular)"
Me: "Do it in a hot bath and cut arm veins length-wise like Romans ;)"
Me: "(Reading through text Nick had already edited) LOL! *This* bit is so wicked and shrewd!"
Nick: "You wrote it."
Me: "Naturally! (And mucho thank youz for leaving it as such!) That's why it's so wicked and shrewd >:D"
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This is how the two described their experience working with yours truly, moi!
Andres: "I feel I'm in Victorian England... Nick is Abraham Van Helsing. You are Dracula. I'm Jon Harker. The book is Wilhemina Morris."
(Pay no attention to them! They hate me so they couldn't have said anything pretty!)
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The following image perfectly depicts a scene of Nick explaining to
us Augustus Tiberius' stance to astrology. The image is spot on! Nick is
shown as being his serious self. Andres is depicted in his pajamas,
having woken up early to work on the book or because of his regular insomnia. I'm faking paying attention to
Nick's words while OCD-ing my way through tying up loose ends. Anyway, Nick's explanations turned out to be somewhat redundant in the end, as unbeknownst to him at the time, we had already mentioned the divine Augustus' astrologer further on in the text.
Then
there's this second image symbolizing how the actual editing process
took place.
Mind you, it's not exaggerated. Nick's reply to it was: ":-) it would be much worse if I had access to my editing software... and quicker...".
So you can see, my small yet ever so cool number of readers, the
horrors I have to endure just to offer you guys with the best I can
provide. I mean, look at the sadistic, cynical emoji he used (btw, Nick,
the "-" is redundant here!). It would be very funny if it weren't agonizingly excruciating, especially since I imagined things would go like so:
But noooooooo... Can you imagine going through all those pages this way??? Sigh... He even made us adjust the title of the book and while I find the end result very sexy, this goes to show the extent to which Nick exerted his tyrannical ways. But never mind that! What counts is that the fun involved in seeing through with this project dwarfs the gruesome torture I had to endure :D I could make a comic strip depicting the entire creation of this book using all the tarot cards. In fact, here's another one, just for kicks.
Come to think of it, I can name it "Redundant! Editing books with Nick Farrell"! Hah!
I could also write a book I'd call "Nick Farrell fulfills his destiny" in which I'd go straight to the point:
"Nick Farrell was a world-class magician, renowned occult writer, and Pontifex Maximus of the GD-PGM tradition he created. One day his Higher Genius made him come across... me! Unbeknownst to Nick at the time, he began to drift more and more into a zone where normal things... don't happen... very often... A zone where one slides on the path towards endless excruciating suffering... on unsalted butter... and where unsalted butter... has more than one use..."
And then there's this:
I'm not a shaman, I don't know how many times I have to repeat it, Dracula Jr. :P
ReplyDeleteOh stfu and go out there and get your glory! You're a shaman to ME! End of discussion :p
ReplyDelete