Fitness magick: Ritual workings for losing weight and building muscles

It seems all that living in doors that's been happening for around an year now has taken its toll on people. Since things have started to improve (thanks to some idiot and several great people, and Meanie and his Zazzi) and people are once more out on the streets, all that indoor living is showing and few would mind showing off the lard they've acquired over the past year. 

As such, yours truly is offering you guys a simple magical solution: FITNESS MAGICK (link to the left side of the screen too), to help anyone in need burn off that fat ass and start looking more attractive by increasing muscles. It's so simple to do even my occult-challenged relatives can do it!

Get it, work it, walk outside acting and feeling kewl!

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo  

Another happy reader

One of my dear readers surprised me earlier today with these photos. I had no idea he bought Asteria, but he bought Chiron too! The horizontal transfer of knowledge is picking up speed and more people benefit from pretty info each day.

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

Inside Asteria

My pesky reader from the enchanted North was ever so kind as to share a few images from inside Asteria, since my copy is taking several Apocalypses to get here...  This is because meanie-jerk Nick Farrell, Pagan Saint refused to let me peek under her skirt! (Asteria's!)

So I thought I'd share with you one of these images just so you'd see the page layout and all that. I for one think it is as it should be and I'm eagerly awaiting for my copy to arrive just so I'd thoroughly comb it for errors and curse Nick once I spot them d:<

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

Speedy justice has been served BIG TIME!

Last year I got fined for the equivalent of around $250 on Palm Sunday. The whole thing happened because I dared to have a drink and a smoke in a deserted public park despite that being banned because of the whole virus crap. Yea, yea, I'm sure people will say I deserved it because I broke the rules, but the hell with their rules! I paid the fine nonetheless, otherwise it would've doubled after 24h.

However... How dare you fine The Hand of Karma??? God's hitman!!! So I sued them and then I woowoo-ed them! I didn't even have to go to the lousy court, I merely sent them the necessary details online, because of the whole virus crap. Within a month the Constitutional Court here declared those kinds of fines being unconstitutional. Ha! After dragging their asses for several months, because of the whole virus crap, the court had no choice but to favor me. Ha! 

Asteria in the enchanted North

Yesterday a dear person has shared the above photo of Asteria. Current Mercury retro has worked in her favor, as the package got to her much sooner than expected. This is even more surprising, since the pesky reader lives where no man dares to venture, beyond the land of the fearsome frost giants and the ice-wolfs, so the poor delivery guy must've teleported to her location after having found a magical portal on his path, otherwise I'm sure he would've never made it to the destination and no one would've heard from him ever since. I hope for his sake the magical portal was there for his return, but who cares...

The important thing is that the pesky reader in question has gotten her eville hands on Asteria and can now make use of it to the extreme, as she's planning to perform some pretty rituals on certain people of influence. May you crush them good!

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

PS: the feather is poking Nick :)))))

What goes around

A few weeks ago I was contacted by a girl who wanted me to help her deal with and eliminate the gossip she was subjected to. Long story short, the mother of a guy she was with many years ago started gossiping about her on social media (I hate social media!) and blamed her for all the loser's misfortunes later on in life. As you can imagine, this directed unwanted attention towards her which threatened her image, as she is currently involved in a pretty relationship. 

The client sent me the target's data and agreed to perform a simple working aside from what I had prepared for turning the cockroach's gossip against her. Lo and behold, the loser found out about his mother's gossip, in which case his current girlfriend also found out, leading to him to beating his girlfriend and being visited by the cops who from what I heard only gave him a fine. 

Pretty ritual

No words can express how honored I feel someone whom I admire greatly has started using The Magick of Chiron on themselves. I cannot say who the person is or why they are using it even though that would score points for me in the occult community big time, yet confidentiality and the person's needs are far more important than my selfishness so I shall leave it as such.

I hope it serves you well!

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo 

5* x2

I was pleasantly surprised to see Asteria selling across the planet. It has received two 5* reviews from two readers far apart from each other.

May it serve you well!

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

Standing out in the crowd

Andres and I were informed people noticed the title on Asteria's spine is "the wrong way around". I personally don't know what "the right way around" is because, as I keep mentioning whenever the situation arises, I hate to read. Therefore, you can imagine I haven't dealt with books that much so... yea. Andres, on the other hand is a scholar, philosopher, scientist, and nerd and he's got a great collection of books. He's told me not all his books have the title on the spine turned a certain way and I believe him. Come to think of it, I think I remember grandpappy's books didn't have the orientation of their spine title... So what about it?!

It just makes Asteria stand out more inside the bookcase! This way any practicing occultist can easily spot it, grab it and look up election recommendations. Voila! Problem solved.

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

Asteria on Lulu!

 

Since we received reports not everyone can purchase Asteria from Amazon, we have also made it available on Lulu. People now have two options for buying it and others might be available further on. Therefore, you can now look up the book in either one of the following sources that are also shown to the left of the blog:

Asteria on Amazon

Asteria on Lulu

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

May it serve you well!

I got an email from Witchy Witch this morning saying "A little something arrived in the mail for me today :) Congratulations!" and the above photo. I want to thank her for the unexpected surprise by saying she's doing some amazing tarot readings and you can book one by accessing her page Six Star Tarot, which you can also find in as a stand-alone link to the right of the blog.

May it serve you well!

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo

Asteria unavailable?!

Andres and I are aware by now Asteria is not available for purchase to people in certain countries. This has to do with Amazon policies regarding those respective countries, things having to do with local tax regulations and so on which are beyond our power to fix. I for one cannot order Asteria from any Amazon domain in Europe, not even from the UK which has ceased to be part of the EU, but I can order from Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, Amazon.jp for instance. Therefore, anyone interested in purchasing Asteria can try another Amazon domain.

We are currently working on establishing additional ways in which those who are interested can purchase the book, different from Amazon, so that more people will be able to have access to it. We will announce them as soon as they are available.

Thank you for your understanding.

Hate on, dum-dums!

The Great Gazoo